Deadness

Hi all,

If you are reading this, I thank you for actually checking out my blog even though I have not posted since after Christmas. It does mean that one of the following:

  1. You enjoy skimming through my posts to check out what’s new in my life
  2. You enjoy reading my witty posts and hoped to see a new one posted so you can have a chuckle or two
  3. You like the photos I take and wanted to check out some of my newer ones (hah, as if)
  4. You weren’t actually looking for this site, but Google screwed up again
  5. You were bored out of your mind and remembered reading this blog some time ago so decided “heh, why not”

Whatever the case, I have been a little busy and have not gotten much time online but I promise a new post will come out soon. One of these will definitely be some thoughts about Avatar which I just watched yesterday and also a guide that I have been writing (in my iPhone) during my spare time. So please do hurry back soon!

By the way, Happy New Year! Don’t forget to make your New Year’s resolutions! 2010 is going to be a good year.

Merry Christmas!

Hello all,

Christmas is often a misunderstood holiday – A day that people countdown to not due to their eagerness but instead the remaining days left to shop for Christmas presents. But what about Christmas spirit? What ever happened to that?

From my previous post, it was clear that my Christmas was going to be a sad one. There is however, something about Christmas that I felt – A slight surge of happiness that ran through myself as I walked through Sydney City on Christmas Eve. Let me paint a picture: As I walked across the busy streets watching the cars rushing home before midnight, I heard the ringing of bells and the carolers singing; I looked up to notice the massive decorated church that shone brightly in the night. You just can’t ignore Christmas in the streets of Sydney on its Eve. Even though this stroll was followed by alcohol and music, this brief moment just did it for me.

If you got to do any of the below, I am already very jealous because they are 3 things I wish to keep tradition for all my Christmases.

  1. To eat roast for Christmas Dinner
  2. To set up and/or decorate the Christmas tree
  3. To watch an episode of the Chipmunks

I hope everyone else had their special Christmas moment and didn’t just go out partying! Just want to wish everyone a

xmas
(belated) Merry Christmas

Armed with my disappointing 2 megapixel iPhone I was able to take some photos of the amazing deco in Sydney city. Being the crappy camera it was, however, these photos really didn’t turn out well.

Christmas Blues

As the 25th of December creeps up, I realize how boring it’s going to be. I am currently back in Australia – The country where Christmas is celebrated at home with mash, salads, punch and roasted meat. Unfortunately, I am here alone, with most of my close friends overseas with their families. I am thankful that my housemate will be here and so will some other friends who are loners like us.

What does Christmas mean to me?

I was always a sucker for Christmas. The songs and stories always brought a smile to my face – Probably because of how they would always remind me of the simpler times. My parents made it a point to celebrate Christmas when I was young: my Dad actually dressed as Santa once.

As we grow up, we tend to lose our Christmas spirits – but not me – Two Christmases ago, I surprised my parents by purchasing and setting up a Christmas tree at home. Decorating the tree reminded me so much of childhood. This year however, I’m not there to set it up so I assume the house will be Christmas tree-less

Best things about Christmas

To me there are a few weird things that I will always relate Christmas with:

  1. Home Alone
  2. The Chipmunks (who else from my generation can deny this?)
  3. Decorating the Christmas Tree
  4. The Nutcracker
  5. Being the one that gets to put the Angel or the Star on the top of the Christmas tree

So what are my plans for Christmas?

Nothing yet. I could easily organize a Christmas Dinner at my house but there just aren’t that many people here. The closest friends I have here get to eat food their Mum cooked or Dad bought home.

What do I want for Christmas?

A dinner with family and friends; a new pair of shoes; or a new wallet.


I am not upset or depressed about this at all – This post is mainly for me to remind those who get to celebrate Christmas with their family and friends of how lucky they are.

My first Christmas away from Malaysia, let’s see how it goes.

If there are any bloggers out there reading this post, do post what your love or hate for Christmas! :) Reading it would atleast give me something to do over these un-happening days.

How to identify a Poser Drunk

After browsing some Facebook photos I have to say, I am a very mean person when I am sober. Then I get drunk and start posing. This is a quick post to highlight the discovery of a new species of drunk: The Poser Drunk. This is a quick guide to identifying a Poser Drunk.

Pre-High Stage: Evil mode.

When I walk into the room, my drunk-radar switches on. I rush to the drunkest person I can find and snap a photo of me with them. This is where I exploit my power of condescending on these victims (who are usually not drunk and instead just have good blood circulation).

14739_209817834876_521249876_3124025_1400158_nI began the night taking a photo with the two-drink-tomato, Kawing

10957_245920508507_832293507_4254955_4557804_nLater on in the night, still pretty sober, I found another victim. I don’t know what pose Andrew Tan is doing

I followed this photo up with some pretty strong stuff. This ofcourse led to the malfunctioning of my radar and the Post-High stage

Post-High Stage: Poser mode.

During the Pre-High Stage, you may have noticed how I have my fingers pointing at my victims or the surroundings in an attempt to show my “superiority” in soberness. This is in actual fact, a cover-up of me warming up for The Cowboy Pose mode.What is this Cowboy Pose you may ask? A move that requires precision and accuracy that can only be acquired with constant training and vigilence: You place one arm around another person in a shot as if to hold them hostage; then, with your other hand, create what can be recognized as a guns (revolvers would be recommended, anything larger might make you look stupid); and finally you point this gun at them as if they really were your hostage.

20457_388032985226_669430226_10301468_1527134_nEddy and I. Note how my right arm holds him so that he cannot get away as my revolver threatens him to not do anything funny

20457_388033020226_669430226_10301473_8322434_nAs the night passes, I take more drinks and Poser mode goes to another level. I take Kay Chong as my 2nd hostage and in this photo you can actually see my other hand evolving into my second revolver

20457_388033005226_669430226_10301471_1446521_nHere I am, guns ablazing. You can literally see the fear in Nee Kee’s face as he silently cries for help.

20457_388033015226_669430226_10301472_7043212_nI then sober up a bit and decide to keep my hands out of the shot to avoid taking photos with the same pose hence the lack of fear in Yin Yi‘s face

Drunk Stage: Over Poser Mode.

Some idiot then buys more jugs and I hit the point of no return

20457_388032970226_669430226_10301467_6374078_nMy pose reaches new limits with my hand now wielding a gun instead of being shaped as one. I have reached the highest level of posing where I have now assumed I am a model and will try to look like what I have seen in magazines. My body bends slightly, just as a model I saw in the newspaper of some model (probably female, crap). Eddy gives me a taste of my own medicine both condescending me and Cowboy Posing me.

Hence ends the guide to identifying a Poser Drunk.

Hope you enjoyed the post – It was a fun night for me and my last alcoholic night before I left Malaysia. Cheers.

Thanks for the photos: Yen, Mabel and Yinyi.

The Day the Earth Stood Still

For those who have been tagged, it wasn’t for marketing purposes. It was cause of a tiny little shoutout for you at the bottom of the post. Sorry if it was spam!

(The Day the Earth Stood Still a.k.a James’ Last Day in Malaysia). Day is defined as counting up 24 hours till my flight (10.40 PM on Sunday, 20th December)

On Saturday night I headed over to Pan Bakery to say my good byes to The Keeper, Ellie, Kwong Heng, Joe, Khye, Kenny Tan, and Kenny Wong. It was a very unplanned thing but meant a lot to me. Thanks for coming you guys – Goodbyes whether in hugs, handshakes or just words are always important to me.

However, this yumcha session was pretty much killed by Ellie‘s suggestion to play Basketball early the next morning leading the pack to all go home for a good night’s rest. I would also like to add that I never got a goodbye hug, handshake or wish from Ellie in person (don’t worry she makes up for it later in the story).

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Ellie taking a photo of Kenny Tan and Joe

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Khye being mysterious and sexy

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Please focus your attention to Joe. HAHA.

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A purposely over-photoshoped photo of The Keeper.

It was good that I had plans at Bangsar after with the Sydney kaki as it was Maku’s blow-cake session for his birthday. I went over to Bangsar Shopping Complex at WIP to meet with Marcus, Chew, Kenneth, Daryl, Krystle (and her Ozzie-accented cousin), E Guy and Afiq. Due to the alcohol overload from the night before, I was seen sipping my ice water in the corner. It was your normal cake-blowing session but getting to see all of the Sydney Kaki and the people I have met this trip just had to be done.

IMG_0229Daryl and my not-so-artistic shot playing with the new camera (which I have dubbed Ixy).

IMG_0236My new girlfriend (Ixy)’s twin sister. Oh and Krystle in the background.

IMG_0255A lot more delicious than it looks.

IMG_0227“My lips like sugar…” Chew

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Look at Marcus‘ smile. Such a happy little boy. Happy Birthday, bro! Hope you’re glad I could be back for it. Please enjoy my Breathalyzer birthday present!

The next day I went for another Yumcha session in the afternoon with Nee Kee, Kwong Heng, Euvern and Joe. Again, you guys are awesome for coming and keeping with my traditional send off. It was good to recap the holiday with you guys and talk about all the random crap we usually talk about. Thanks for sticking by my side all this time!

After that, a homecooked meal with the family (which I forgot to take a photo of) and a rush to the airport.

Ellie was my SMS-mate during the last few hours of emo-ness before I boarded the plane. Thank you so much, dear.

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This is officially the last thing I ate in Malaysia: A Sardine Roll and Ice Lemon Tea.

Once again, I bid farewell to my friends and family.

Shoutouts go out to all the awesome friends:

  • Aileen “Soft-Nose” Lim
  • Alvin “The Keeper” Lam
  • Andrew “Drunkard” Tan
  • Angel “Damn-fierce-wan” Chen
  • Chin “Tie-Losing” LY
  • Daryl “Ehhhhhhh” Soh
  • Ellie “Really-MissyCheerio” Chee
  • Eugene “Pokerface” Quah
  • Euvern “I-can’t-get-it-up” Koay
  • Hanis “Kambing” O’Hara
  • Jaclyn “Tiny Girl” Choo
  • Joe “Sexy Kantam” Ong
  • Jon “Orange” D’Cruz
  • Juliana “Tai Ka Che” Loh
  • Kenny “Kewo” Wong
  • Kah Kiat “Sneakers” Chan
  • Kawing “Turban” Li
  • Kay “Mahjong-God” Chong
  • “Kenettttt” Chen
  • Kenny “K Z E R ø” Tan
  • Kenny “Working-Man” Hew
  • Kevin “Emo-Sober-but-Happy-Drunk” Chan
  • Kwong Heng “Way too many nicknames” Tang
  • Marcus “Taikoh” Moi
  • Melanie “Whateveeerrrrr” Loh
  • Racheal “Still-damn-fierce” Tan
  • See “Rainbow” Nee Kee
  • SK “Korean” Siew
  • Thee “Sunglasses” Khye
  • Tracy “:)” Tan
  • “Uncle” Wai Hing
  • Vinson “Skinnies” Tam
  • Wai “Never Change” King
  • William “Never-Age” Loh
  • Yen Yen “Not-so-innocent” Goh

Also, shoutouts to the people I met this trip that I can’t yet give nicknames to:

  • Afiq
  • April
  • Chelsea
  • E Guy (Good luck in your future ‘ventures’)
  • Eddie/Eddy
  • Isabel
  • Krystle (You have the hottest camera ever)
  • Mabel
  • Yinyi

See you soon. Trust me… Real soon. :)

Happy Birthday, Dad

Last Friday was Dad’s birthday. As boring a post as this is, I think it will still serve as a good Dear Diary post to remember what we did on this special day of 2009.

We first had our lunch at a buffet place in Hilton Sentral. I really don’t remember the name of the place but you should be able to recognize it from the photos.

IMG_0205My Mum and the Birthday boy

IMG_0184Well this was it. Interior I would definitely have to say the interior design did well. But in terms of buffet variety there really wasn’t much.

IMG_0181Pretty light.. Oooooo…

Since it was a buffet and I was pretty bored, I have photos of each course I took. I could have easily surpassed the 5 courses I went for but my body doesn’t seem to consume much during the daytime.

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Course 1: Always start with the raw stuff. The Sushi pretty random, but the plate looked a bit bare without it.

IMG_0171Course 2: The salads. That’s basically all they had to make your own (western) salad: Carrots, Tomatoes and Lettuce.

IMG_0173Course 3: The main course. This was all the Western food available. I didn’t feel like eating Malaysian food because I could get much more authentic Malaysian food at any hawker shop.

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Course 4: The oysters return.

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Course 5: The dessert. You have no idea how pissed I was because they did not serve jelly.

Our dinner though, made up for Hilton’s lack of variety. Relatives came over to my house and we had a feast of what I can definitely label as the authentic Malaysian cuisine.

IMG_0210I will end this post with a photo of my Dad when he came home on the eve of his Birthday (past his curfew!) to receive the present from the family.

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I know my Dad probably will never stumble upon this blog but I if I could say something to him through here for his birthday it would probably sound something like this:

As kids we would label all of you people as the grown ups or the parents. As I have grown up, I am pretty sure I was the problem child in the family and I have probably put you through a lot of crap. Because of this I, too, would always resent you for the punishments you gave me – but obviously like every other child out there, we grow up someday and realize how thankful we should be for the things you have done that have moulded us into what we are today. I hope you had a great birthday this year! I am glad I could extend my flight to be there for it.

You know when people say “they do it because they love you”? Well, they really do.

One Night in Genting

Just got back from Genting and decided to do a quick update. Pretty much a guys night out with Joe, Kwong Heng, Wai Hing, Choon Yeah and Kenny Tan. Since it rained just before we drove up, it was very (very) misty. Visibility conditions were extremely poor and we could hardly see a thing outside.

IMG_0117This was what we could see. Apologies for the blurness, it was a bumpy ride.

After that frightening ride up, Starbucks was packed so we headed for the arcades while Joe and Wai Hing went to gamble in the Casino. It must also be mentioned that we gave them pooled money to bet on the average of our combined birthdays on roulette – Failed! Thanks, Wai Hing.

At the arcades, the only thing really worth mentioning would be Kwong Heng‘s winnings. Little kids, look away for you will be scared.

IMG_0129Gangster protecting his chick (appropriately named Baby)

IMG_0128Me taking my undang (driving exam).

IMG_0133After that, we returned to Starbucks and got our seats. This was when we were told of Joe and Wai Hing‘s success stories and played Dai Dee.

IMG_0132Joe‘s post-winning face. Looks like some other kind of face though. Maybe the Spiderman face?

Although I lacked the photos (guys just don’t camwhore), it was a great night. Kenny imitating Rocky (in front of everyone); Choon Yeah shivering his butt off; Joe spending on us; Kwong Heng & his Baby; and Wai Hing… just being Wai Hing.

I will end this post with what will hopefully get you in the Christmas spirit, because it definitely got me. The decorations at Highlands Hotel:

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Kinkiness? No. [Probably 18SX]

This was probably my first weekend I am actually free since I came back to Malaysia for holidays as I was pretty busied up with my brother’s wedding. This weekend, I was able to meet up with lots of my ex-Sydney mates and some of their friends too.

Friday was our fail pub-hopping from Tom, Dick & Harry to Sid’s Pub in Taman Tun. Got to meet up with Kenneth, Daryl, Yen Yen, SK, Kevin and Marcus along with Krystle for the first time. Kwong Heng, Nee Kee and Captain Seng Keat joined up later too. I hate how my first impression to Krystle was “WHAT?! YOU HAVE THE SAME CAMERA THAN ME (in red too)!?” I hope she won’t judge me. Table talk included all of the old stories and also some new “education”.

Little kids, press page down a couple of times. You have been warned.

(Take note that the below may also be a little offensive)

One of our conversations strayed to kinky disgusting sex moves. Of these, we discussed the Dirty Sanchez, the Angry Dragon and the Spiderman. And yes, as a good Samaritan, I will share my knowledge with those that do not know what these are.Note that they are all described from the male perspective of sexual intercourse.

The Spiderman was described as: when you are about to finish off, walk away to ruin the moment, then turn back and (while doing the Spiderman fingers) finish off on her face (I think). Now, I laughed at just picturing this. However, I searched online and apparently the real definition is a lot funnier.

When a girl is going down on you, and just before you climax you pull out of her mouth and nut in your own hand. Then fling the jism in her face, as you jump to your feet, making sure to properly mimic Spidey’s web slinging hand motions. Now stand in a position of bravery, and power like any superhero would. Be sure not to react when she yells at you. Stand tall and proud, not too many guys get the chance to do that these days.

Source: Urban Dictionary

Priceless.

spidermanJust could not resist Photoshoping Mr. Happy-Cat on.

The Angry Dragon was another funny move. We were told that when finishing off during a blowjob, you smack the back of the girl’s head to make your load come out of her nose. This move has been named so because when she gets up with all that dribbling from her nose, she’s gonna look like one very angry dragon.

This move will likely give you the wife-beater label so try it at your own risk. As mean as it sounds though, it’s still hilarious. Please don’t mention feminist issues because I do acknowledge how very male-chauvinistic these ‘sex moves’ are.

angrydragon

The Dirty Sanchez is something a lot worse than either of these moves and would probably make you sick to your stomach. Hence, to avoid scaring visitors away, you can take a read at Wikipedia.

A search on Google also got me lots more weird sexual acts. Check them out here.

End of possibly offensive and 18SX stuff

I have some dirty friends. But I guess that’s also the most entertaining kind. :)

Photos from the night are below. They are also avid cam-whores and posers. Tsk tsk.


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This was pretty much my Friday night dinner. Was delicious – Until people starting cracking up jokes relating French Fries to male appendages… Kids! :P

IMG_0071I miss my $7.00 Snake Bites in Sydney.

IMG_0084Me and Yen Yen are actually posing. Kevin wants his spotlight.

IMG_0082I don’t know what Daryl and Yen Yen are doing. Kenneth seems be simulating a pirate, I think.

IMG_0077Me and Yen Yen. My shirt title: Rock Out With Your Cock Out (note the Rooster on the right)

IMG_0075Palat! (Inside joke)

IMG_0055That famous curious pose of mine…

IMG_0069Retired gangsters of Sydney, Kenneth and Daryl - Still trying.

IMG_0092Krystle and emoboy Kevin

IMG_0094After the Photoshoping, I thought this photo looked pretty good.

IMG_0095“Om gonna turn moi lyfe araund.” – Kenneth

Few comments on the photos:

  • I have no idea why all the photos with Marcus and SK in them are blurry.
  • A lot of the photos lack in quality and are grainy – Still getting used to the camera!
  • Why are there so many photos of Kenneth?!

Christmas in the Air

Thursday began with a trip down to Digital Mall with my old buddy Joe. The objective was to purchase a digital camera to replace my beloved DSLR (I miss you, Pentax) – Which I did. Below is a test shot taken by the lady setting up my new camera. I have fallen prey to the evil clutches of Canon.

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Thanks for coming, Joe! In return I shall put up your cheeky ass photo.

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At night we basically had a poker and drinks session. Was a very chilled out thing with Kwong Heng, Kenny HewEllie, Alvin, Aileen, Jaclyn, Euvern, Fernie, and Tracy (and her other half + family!).

It was pretty fun. Socializing with people I didn’t know and catching up with people I already knew. I wish I had photos of the Foosball games we were having, but Uncle Euvern said the Foosball table was off limits.

IMG_0012Pretty neat shot by either Alvin or Ellie (everyone was playing with my camera)

IMG_0028Just another game of poker.

IMG_0031I brought Ellie‘s colouring book. Look at that smile!

IMG_0044The beautiful Jaclyn with a sore throat – Still smiling for the camera. Kich with his enthusiasm in the background.

IMG_0050Training the camwhoring with Aileen.

IMG_0036Tracy‘s poker face, apparently.

IMG_0021Christmas, anyone? :)

IMG_0023That’s Ellie playing with the new camera, by the way. YES, ITS RED.

IMG_0043Obviously by the end of the night, The Keeper was gone (due to sleep deprivation)

Just want to make one last shout out to Ellie. Sorry about FFKing you in the afternoon! The camera shopping took a bit longer than I expected.

Here’s to you:

IMG_0017Ellie‘s flower. Looks pretty damn good!

Who is Jah-mez?

I have been bored waiting for my ride, so I changed the default welcome message (on the right):

Who am I? Each minute that passes, we are redefined in some way or another. Consider every blog post as an updated definition of myself. What I think cannot change is my interest in photography, graphics & design, my love for red and my passion to write the random.

Who am I? Each minute that passes, we are redefined in some way or another. Consider every blog post as an updated definition of myself. What I think cannot change is my interest in photography, graphics & design, my love for red and my passion to write the random

When writing this I just could not come up with a paragraph explaining who I am. I imagine this little piece of text to never be updated in say, 2 years. With this in mind, I had trouble writing this less-than-50 words blurb about my blog.

Still bored, here are 3 random things about me that I can use as a benchmark in the future. Other bloggers are welcome to try this out and in 1 or 2 years, look back at these quirks of  yours and note if you have changed or not or maybe add new quirks. Well that’s the plan.

1. Jelly Addiction

Hand me a spoon of jelly and I will beat you with the spoon. When it comes to jelly (any type, really), I require at least a salad bowls worth of it. I was born with an extra stomach designed to dissolve jelly. As a kid I loved Aeroplane Jelly and I still do. Below is the Aeroplane Jelly advertisement in 1957 with it’s signature song that I memorized at the age of 5.

2. Obsessive Curiosity Disorder (my OCD)

I am sure many people have this too. However, I feel that I suffer from a very severe case of this. The phrase “it’s on the tip of my tongue” usually means a sleepless night for me. If there is something I cannot remember (yet I am sure that I know of), I will do whatever it takes to find out what that is. What I do ranges from doing a search with 3G to calling someone overseas to find out (true story). I hope I recover from this before I start having memory problems when I’m old and frail.

curious

The curious pose (my favourite). Does posing tell a lot about your personality? Hm.

3. Bitchiness

I am bitchy. But this isn’t what this random point is about. I love doing imitation bits and my favourite (and also probably the best party trick) has to be my ‘hot chick’. You name it, I can do it – The whatever and talk to the hand; the oh my god!; the shrieking and even the hair toss. Before all of the homosexual jokes start popping out, let me highlight the word, imitations. I really hope I grow out of this one.


Well those are 3 of my quirks. I will review these again in the years to come. 10th December is my weird quirk day. :) When is yours?