Here I will begin this new feature of mine. I have always wanted to post stuff I find on the news but I felt like it was just basically posting up unoriginal material.

This weekly feature (Friday, ofcourse) will feature some news articles I found that are worth posting up here. Sometimes I guess these be more biased towards my interests (technology, media, etc.) but I hope these will prove as interesting reads!

Man Buried in Haiti Rubble Uses iPhone to Treat Wounds, Survive
January 20, 2010. Source: Wired

So basically, an American Film-maker survived after being trapped in Haiti for 65 hours due to apps on his iPhone. This is huge! The iPhone has just proven it isn’t just something that keeps you pre-occupied on the toilet seat – It saves lives too.

iPhone users rejoice. Just wait for iDefibrillator to come out then we can really save lives.

Stig ’spotted’ on Google site
January 19, 2010. Source: The Sun

Stig’s signature pose = Folded arms?

Just one of those LOL moments of mine when I read and saw this. I assume the Stig was part of some kind of Top Gear shooting because of the pose. Whether this is the real Stig or not, it’s still hilarious to see and being a fan of Top Gear might be the reason.

Fun-loving clubbers get ready to play at first Australian video game bar
January 20, 2010. Source: News.com.au

Clubbing for Gaming Addicts?

Yes, that’s right. Brisbane will see Australia’s first video game bar. Apparently it has been a success overseas yet I just can’t imagine how this works. I hardly ever attempt to mix alcohol with gaming especially gaming that involves peripherals (as suggested by the article, Guitar Hero and Wii Games are the types of games they look to implement) because of the very high chance someone flings their WiiMote at the TV or drops the peripheral.

Alcohol slows your body’s central nervous system down and this is definitely going to cause accidents.

Have a good weekend, all.

So you’ve all heard about Avatar and how it’s such an awesome movie. Everyone has been telling you about how the effects are awe inspiring, the plotline is gripping, and the characters are believable. So is this movie really the shit or not?

Go back 3 months prior to the movie coming out. I sat in the theatre as the movie trailers went by. “Wow, Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law! Sherlock Holmes.. Got to watch that!” It was after this trailer when the blue men and women appeared on screen running around with bows and arrows. My instinct was “What the…? World of Warcraft the movie!?” Soon after, I saw that huge-ass title, Avatar with actors I’d really never heard of. The only thing that caught me was the Director – but to be honest, Titanic wasn’t my cup of tea and nor was Terminator 3. The effects were nice and all, but we’re now in the age where we’re starting to see flaws with using too much CGI (i.e. Transformers 2). Put all this aside because I later found out that  this movie was being advertised as James Cameron’s little project that took 10 years in the making due to the limited technology – Talk about hyping it up.

Let’s begin.

Pandora is a world inhabited by the Na’vi, blue skinned aliens who are correctly described as indigenous folk living in the forests of Pandora. I have to say, the effects blew me away – Pandora is beautiful and when James Cameron promised spectacular visuals, he delivered. From the characters to the plant life and finally to the battle scenes – All breathtaking. One thing that was unbelievable was how similar the avatars characteristics were to their hosts. The world of Pandora is beautifully laid out and something unique from what I have seen in the sci-fi genre.

And that’s where the positive comments stop. The first thing that sucked was the acting – Apart from our protanogist, Jake Sully (Sam Worthington), Dr. Grace Augustine (Sigourney Weaver) and their badass pilot (Michelle Rodriguez), everyone else outshone in bad performances either being unbelievable or just plain annoying. Taking the Colonel (Stephen Lang) for instance, we have one of the most stereotypical forms of masculinity ever – you might aswell replace him with a man in a penis suit calling everyone a pussy and drinking gatorade in every scene. It is hard to actually judge the animated actors because by itself it’s tough to even get emotionally attached to the characters – As good as the expressions are, it always stuck in my mind that this was just some 3D graphics. Jake Sully is the only one who appeared to have any character development in the story while James Cameron just threw the rest in front of  us assuming we would instantly believe in these one-dimensional characters. An example of this is Michelle Rodriguez who plays Jake Sully’s badass pilot – Now, she is a very talented actress and I enjoyed her in The Fast & the Furious (2001) and S.W.A.T. (2003). In Avatar, Rodriguez makes the most with what little she has (literally) – With the few dialogues she has, she still outperforms the others on screen. However, James Cameron screws things up for her by assuming we are idiots by not giving any explanation as to why this pilot is willing to risk her life for aliens (apart from the fact that she’s sort of the taxi driver for a team that works with them, nope that’s not enough).

Moving on, the plot can be summarized in 3 words: The Last Samurai. Yeah, that Tom Cruise shit. A movie 10 years in the making and we are thrown a blatantly pathetic plotline.

So all in all, yes, the visuals are amazing – but this isn’t an excuse to throw bad performances, crappy scripts and a predictable & uninteresting story at the audience. If you are impressed by pretty colours then yes, the effects are done so well they will immerse you within seconds. If you are actually paying attention to what’s going on, you will realize you can predict just about everything that’s about to happen. For me, I loved the animation but after a while, I started to realize the story was becoming very familiar. I think what really was done wrong was overhype this movie.

Possible Spoilers below!

Keeping with tradition, here are my 5 nit-picks for Avatar:

1. “Unobtainium” – LOL
   Wow, is it me or were the writers really creative when it came to naming this mysterious ore? This extremely unobtainable ore… Hmmm. I actually laughed out loud when I heard this – Comic relief? Maybe.
2. Why does Colonel Hardwood’s Mech have a combat knife?
   I wonder if anyone stopped to wonder why a Mech needs a combat knife. It’s pointless! Surely it would be better to put large blades on their arms rather than give them a combat knife. Don’t get me started on how there’s a holster for the combat knife.
3. The humans that stayed back
   Okay, so among the lucky ones who stayed back, we have Jake Sully, Norm Spellman (Joel Moore) and Dr. Max Patel (Dileep Rao). Norm Spellman can easily be transferred to his avatar just as Jake Sully was – But what about Dr. Max Patel? Yeah, he’s the indian doctor who was told he wasn’t man enough to escape with the rest. He’s the only human left on Pandora and he needs a gas mask (that I can only assume we are to believe can last forever) to survive. What the heck happens to him?
4. The hair of the Na’vi
   It’s pretty funny how the Na’vi can connect with nature. Not a spiritual connection, nope. They connect via cables from their hair. Kind of like a plug and play thing going on. The Na’vi are like walking USB thumb drives.
5. Very tactical strategy by the marines
   In the final battle, the marines’ plan is to strap together tons of explosives and just literally drop it on their enemies. This has to be the stupidest strategy ever. Also, for some reason, the marines only have one drop ship carrying this dangerous payload. I guess there’s no wind on Pandora to worry about the explosives missing their target.

I must also find 5 great things about Avatar. Here we go:

1. Epic final battle
   The final battle is definitely spectacular. Although it was probably 98% animated, it surprisingly didn’t feel this way due to how immersed you be. There is focus on different perspectives of the battle which I think was also done very well. The last one-on-one battle also was pretty damn good.
2. Pandora is Beautiful
   Just can’t deny the fact that the world of Pandora was a work of art. It is both shown as a paradise of wonder and also a dangerous environment inhabited with the unknown. Very amazing.
3. Sam Worthington
   Great performance! There was a point when the Aussie accent snuck out – Listen carefully in a scene where he says “pain”. I would like to see more movies starring this dude.
4. Parker (played by Giovanni Ribisi)
   Everytime I saw this guy, I gagged. Why? Because everytime I see Giovanni Ribisi, even alongside Nicolas Cage, I am always on the edge of my seat waiting for him to act like a retard. To me, he has already played his role in Friends as Phoebe’s illiterate brother so well that I will never see him as a serious actor.
5. There really isn’t anything else
   I’ve sat here for about 40 minutes trying to think of a reason to watch this, but the 4 above (3 actually, since the last one is more of a personal preference) are the only reasons this movie is good.

Rating:
(4/10)

I would like to add I paid $58AUD for my two tickets. I have no idea how this happened because I was offered a special deal with popcorn and coke. I definitely didn’t get my $58 worth.

Attended the screening of Zombieland on Tuesday (courtesy of Ellie) with herself, Tracy, Alvin, Euvern and Joe. I heard some very mixed reviews about the movie: people complaining it was either not funny enough or not scary enough.

Here are my two cents.

The movie was never meant to be taken seriously, if you did walk into the theatre expecting a true horror flick, you’re just a twit. The corny name gives it away pretty fast. Looking at the posters, the phrases are “This place is so dead” and “Nut up or shut up” – Definitely not horror. I am glad the movie also didn’t attempt to be too blatant with it’s comedy – Stupid funny is just not funny since Borat. Zombieland does not focus on a single genre and instead combines elements of classic horror movies with some pretty decent action scenes and to top it all off, comedy on the sidelines to keep in theme with the corniness. The romance plot felt very clichéd but again, it was just for laughs.

Great movie if you’re like me and you love the gore. What was cool was the Zombies’ makeup that flawlessly seem to combine elements from classics like Night of the Living Dead and even modern day Zombie movies like Resident Evil.

To review this, I have decided not to go for long paragraphs of text and instead some points.

Possible Spoilers below!

I have 5 nit-picks (like I have for everything) about the movie:

1. Zombie Intelligence
   Zombies seem stupid enough to run into car doors yet they are smart enough to both climb up an Amusement Park rides and slowly let themselves down fences when climbing over them (wouldn’t a Zombie just climb over and drop down?).
2. Tallahassee and Little Rock
   Corniest cliché of the movie has to be when Little Rock shoots the ride controls because of advice from Tallahassee. This just didn’t need to be in the movie in my opinion. It was just slapped on to create a sense of relationship between Tallahassee and Little Rock.
3. Special effects were pretty bad
   My golden rule for this is do not use special effects if the budget does not allow for decent quality. Not all action sequences require CGI effects.
4. Lack of chainsaw action was very disappointing
   Considering the poster itself had a chainsaw, I was looking forward to seeing some Left4Dead action but sadly, I was doubly disappointed. Yes, I love the gore.
5. The decisions made by Wichita and Little Rock are unbelievable and do not make much sense
   Driving the Hummer into the water to kill maybe 2% of the Zombies around them and losing their only means of escape; Going on that Solero-Shot ride just to get surrounded by Zombies; the whole idea of going to the Amusement Park and starting up the power was stupid altogether.

Also, 5 great things about the movie to look out for:

1. The Ghostbusters theme
   Don’t really need to justify much.
2. On-going jokes
   These constant on-going jokes not only gripped the audience but also aided in telling the story.
3. In my opinion, great performance by Woody Harrelson (Tallahassee)
   Last I saw him was in 2012 where he was wrongly casted. The redneck Tallahassee suits Harrelson much more than the crazy conspiracy theorist, Charlie Frost.
4. The Rules of Zombieland
   The rules of our scared little protagonist are both believable and funny as hell.
5. Left4Dead Similarities
   Yeah before watching this, I was told it was the Left4Dead movie. The movie poster showed 4 people with weapons familiar to the game. I wonder how much was inspired by Left4Dead. You definitely can’t deny how much you’ll want to play Left 4 Dead (1 or 2) after watching this. Dark Carnival, anyone?

On a lighter note, Was great to meet (the now worldly-renowned) Amanda after god knows how many years. Apparently, to get her number I had to chat her up. So guys, the pick-up line of 2009 is “Hey, I think I deleted your number”. Go for it. [I am so lame]

Supposed to meet up with Tracy and Ellie in a sec. Signing out.

As usual, my reviews will contain some spoilers, but assuredly nothing that will really affect your movie experience. I still do not recommend reading the review if you have not watched the movie – I watched it without even seeing the trailer!

Peter Jackson returns to produce District 9 and what more can we expect from the man who gave us Lord of the Rings. Neill Blomkamp (originally the writer of the canceled Halo movie) bases this movie off his short film entitled Alive in Joburg. This low-budget ($30 million) film surprisingly surpasses all expectations whether low or high. It makes you wonder as to whether or not if the budget was higher, there would just be too much Computer Generated Imagery (CGI) to ruin it all (thanks, Transformers).

The symbolism of District 9 is pretty straightforward and in your face when the entire movie takes place in Johannesburg, South Africa and involves cruelty to Aliens. This reflects similar issues going on in South Africa, today. This not-so subliminal message is constant throughout the film aiding in both character and plot development.

There are a number of characters all of which you will never get to know except the main protagonist, Wikus and his alien sidekick, Christopher. Personally, Wikus never really gained my respect. Throughout the movie his image is thrown between likeable and hated until finally there is realization. However, what bothered me the most was that at the end of the movie I just never cared much for his relationship with his wife. Yes, he shouts and cries a lot about how much he wants to be with her again but that’s just it. The relationship between Christopher and his son is a lot more cared about as you see the son hopelessly pointing to the roof of the ship and calling for his father who is stuck outside – this one scene gave me a real sense of relationship. In contrast, everytime the Wikus’ wife called him I would assume she was on her father’s side trying to extract information out of him. This could possibly be attributed to poor acting of his wife but I never actually pinpointed this and it could have been the writers’ faults instead.

District 9 does a great job in making the aliens seem lovable and pitiful despite the ugliness of their exterior. This is probably due to the way their eyes are so freakin’ big (seriously). Anyway, unlike most sci-fi movies out there, this really was not what I had expected – It also allows us to look at the symbolism behind it and realize that people were/are being treated similarly in South Africa.

The plot is straightforward with minimal twists and carries our characters through several obstacles. There is always suspense as we are accommodated to movies these days (where it is possible for anyone to die) and thus we continue to wonder who will survive throughout the movie. There are many times where the impossible is presented so well that the audience too believe this – This is when the writers do well and show how the characters get around these obstacles.

Although many other reviewers question the aliens’ fuel’s DNA rewriting, I do not – It is unexplainable but still believable. For us to compare their fuel with human’s petrol is like comparing Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker (fail joke). Just taking into consideration that if they can fly to Earth and we cannot fly there, obviously our fuel is nowhere near the technological level as the aliens’ fuel.

The CGI is constantly of great quality. It has not been overdone to more than meets the eye and is enough for the audience to fully engage with the sequences. Christopher’s facial expressions are easily read (thanks to those big eyes!) and we are treated to the special effects of several jaw-dropping, mind-blowing, drool-making, eye-opening, rib-tickling, heart-stopping weapons that really should have had their own movie made about them. The documentary-style was effective in allowing the audience to realize the proportions of these aliens and also the ideas and perspectives of different parties about them.

I can confidently say that District 9 is probably the best sci-fi action film out this year. Although there were some character development issues, the movie does well as a whole.

Rating:
(8.5/10)

Below is the short film, Alive in Joburg that District 9 was based off. Enjoy!

Source: Jeremy Clarkson adds Polish to outraged ranks

So when the controversial host announced he had prepared his own spoof ad for the launch of the new Volkswagon Scirocco, the BBC prepared for the worst.

And the worst it got - scores of complaints from outraged viewers after Clarkson lauded the VW’s ability to go from “Berlin to Warsaw in one tank”.

More than 6.7 million viewers watched Clarkson’s “ad”, in which panicked Warsaw citizens fled the city, rushing to board buses and trains as sirens warned of the approaching Germans.

The reference to Adolf Hitler’s invasion of Poland that triggered World War II has sparked a storm of debate in the UK and Europe, with onlookers struggling to decide whether Clarkson’s ad was tasteless or just a bit of fun.

This is obviously not the first time Clarkson has been accused of going over the edge with his satirical comedy. Why are people so sensitive to all of this? I think that there are many people out there who have been deceived by their own ignorance. They have somehow convinced themselves that anyone on TV has to care about what everyone thinks. Top Gear has it’s viewers for it’s entertainment value. This entertainment value is also due to the comedy of the presenters. As much of an obnoxious brat Clarkson acts out to be, he is definitely hilarious to watch. A single comment disrespecting Poles and Clarkson gets slapped with all of this? The fact of the matter is, none of these comments were made in a serious manner and hence we can never really say what Clarkson’s true views are – and even if he was a Polland-hating Nazi from outer space planning world domination, who really cares? What we see on TV is for entertainment; it is hypocritical for Poles to get all sensitive over his comments. If he made a joke about anything else you will see the Pole fans having a giggle and probably backing Clarkson up against whoever he made those satire comments about. Being insensitive is when you make a joke that makes majority of your audience shake their heads – Should have a petition to remove TopGear airing in Polland if they are such pussies.

TV programmes are for entertainment, not for confidence-boosting.

So I watched Transformers: RotF the other day and it was pretty alright for an action flick. Personally, it didn’t do much as a Transformers movie and instead it strayed far from the original Transformers universe. There isn’t much that can be compared to the storyline of the original Transformers. The entire plot (and movie title) revolves around the character ‘the fallen’ trying to destroy suns. This does not even make sense, if their job were to hunt suns wouldn’t that instead be hunting stars? I don’t see how this tiny edit to the script could not have been possible – the audience is not STUPID, we know what stars and suns are (shit, I’m rambling). Secondly, “the fallen” definitely does not look anything like what he does in the Transformers world, does he? *shrugs*.

To be honest, the plot was shit and something extremely random. The first movie too does not have a strong plotline but it focused on how the Transformers came to Earth which wasn’t as hard a task as the second movie that (I guess) had nothing to base its story on.

Minor Points of Rantage

1. Bad comical voices – There are TONS of these little robotic creatures that have high-pitched voices similar to the little minions in Space Jam. They are god awful annoying.
2. LaBeouf’s character calls Bumblebee, bee. This was hilarious for me. I already hate how they’re making Bumblebee stand out among the Autobots because there are so many other cooler Transformers and there’s just nothing special about Bumblebee in the cartoon either. He was the shittiest Transformer of them all! Maybe because he interacted with humans so much I just thought he was starting to be human too.
3. There are COUNTLESS Cisco product placements. Every computer screen will have a little Cisco logo. It’s amazing that Cisco would sponsor a movie, but what is there brand supposed to do to your average movie buff? Do they even know what Cisco does? Cisco, I think you guys got jibbed – This is the worst marketing stunt I have ever heard of.
4. The movie seems to also acknowledge some sort of spiritual world of the Transformers which I just couldn’t accept. It doesn’t have to be so damn meaningful of a movie, I’m disappointed that they tried to stuff so much non-Transformers crap into a Transformers movie.
5. Old Transformers seem to have English accents? Uhhh…?
6. Decepticons that can transform into humans (…Terminator!!). Then go undetected when sitting within an Autobot (instead just getting jizzed on by the car…)?
7. Megan Fox seems pretty useless in this movie. It’s just body shot after body shot. Hmmm – This should be a pro.

The movie does however, pay attention to several details and have kept faithful to some original Transformer elements (hence, listening to what the fans have complained about too) – this really did impress me.

Minor points of Rockage:

1. Body shot after body shot of Megan Fox.
2. Great cars. Too bad the R8 had such short screentime.
3. Impressive visual and sound effects. The transformation sound trully is what I want to watch a Transformers movie for.
4. There finally is a proper mention of how the Decepticons are searching for more energon.
5. Star Scream has an annoying voice! He is a bit too pussy for my liking, when instead he should be talking shit behind Megatron’s back as always.
6. Megatron is rusty because of being underwater.
7. The movie looks at more of a worldwide look rather than how the first one seemed to just show the States as being the entire world (just like how most movies do)
8. The Decepticon remote control car is cute when he’s transformed as the car and driving around. Voice again, is just unbearable.
9. President Obama is mentioned! Very cool how they did that.
10. There is a joke about Swine flu in the movie – This is a great reference to current events. The audience laughed their butt off when this joke was pulled off. Good one!

To be honest I wish I could see a lot more from the cartoon. There were tons of elements in it that could have been chucked into a Transformers movie but they were overlooked. Dinobots? Galvatron (just because he’s cool)? Unicron (massive interplanetary battles WITHOUT humans, just like the cartoon but build the plot on the idea that if the Autbots lose, Unicron eats Earth)? Finally, the introduction of Hot Rod and subsequently RODIMUS PRIME (totally do-able and they made people across the world cry with an animated movie, why not do it with all your fancy Hollywood script writing)!

Also, it would be nice to see more focus on the actual Transformers characters rather than just Bumblebee, (very slightly) Optimus Prime and Megatron? Also, do not base the entire fuckin’ movie on a character you made up (the Fallen) because this character has NOTHING to do with the Fallen from Transformers comics or animated series. Lastly, please put Prime’s face mask back on – Why wasn’t it on in that big forest scene? His face makes him look like  a big robotic ape.

Rating:
(7/10)

Oh my god. Woke up to headlines of MJ’s death. Although I cannot say he was as big a part of my life than he was of many others due to my generation being more of the *shrug* boy-band era, I must say I was a big fan of his gift. The quality in all of his performances was of the highest levels and never failed to just be awesome. One of my all-time favourite music videos has to be Smooth Criminal which was just cool (the music, moves, and even the exhibitation of MJ’s quirkiness in the video was a stunner for me).

Rest in peace, Michael Jackson! And let us hope that the media does not do to you what they did to Heath Ledger. The King of Pop has fallen.