Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Transformers: RotF

So I watched Transformers: RotF the other day and it was pretty alright for an action flick. Personally, it didn’t do much as a Transformers movie and instead it strayed far from the original Transformers universe. There isn’t much that can be compared to the storyline of the original Transformers. The entire plot (and movie title) revolves around the character ‘the fallen’ trying to destroy suns. This does not even make sense, if their job were to hunt suns wouldn’t that instead be hunting stars? I don’t see how this tiny edit to the script could not have been possible – the audience is not STUPID, we know what stars and suns are (shit, I’m rambling). Secondly, “the fallen” definitely does not look anything like what he does in the Transformers world, does he? *shrugs*.

To be honest, the plot was shit and something extremely random. The first movie too does not have a strong plotline but it focused on how the Transformers came to Earth which wasn’t as hard a task as the second movie that (I guess) had nothing to base its story on.

Minor Points of Rantage

  1. Bad comical voices – There are TONS of these little robotic creatures that have high-pitched voices similar to the little minions in Space Jam. They are god awful annoying.
  2. LaBeouf’s character calls Bumblebee, bee. This was hilarious for me. I already hate how they’re making Bumblebee stand out among the Autobots because there are so many other cooler Transformers and there’s just nothing special about Bumblebee in the cartoon either. He was the shittiest Transformer of them all! Maybe because he interacted with humans so much I just thought he was starting to be human too.
  3. There are COUNTLESS Cisco product placements. Every computer screen will have a little Cisco logo. It’s amazing that Cisco would sponsor a movie, but what is there brand supposed to do to your average movie buff? Do they even know what Cisco does? Cisco, I think you guys got jibbed – This is the worst marketing stunt I have ever heard of.
  4. The movie seems to also acknowledge some sort of spiritual world of the Transformers which I just couldn’t accept. It doesn’t have to be so damn meaningful of a movie, I’m disappointed that they tried to stuff so much non-Transformers crap into a Transformers movie.
  5. Old Transformers seem to have English accents? Uhhh…?
  6. Decepticons that can transform into humans (…Terminator!!). Then go undetected when sitting within an Autobot (instead just getting jizzed on by the car…)?
  7. Megan Fox seems pretty useless in this movie. It’s just body shot after body shot. Hmmm – This should be a pro.

The movie does however, pay attention to several details and have kept faithful to some original Transformer elements (hence, listening to what the fans have complained about too) – this really did impress me.

Minor points of Rockage:

  1. Body shot after body shot of Megan Fox.
  2. Great cars. Too bad the R8 had such short screentime.
  3. Impressive visual and sound effects. The transformation sound trully is what I want to watch a Transformers movie for.
  4. There finally is a proper mention of how the Decepticons are searching for more energon.
  5. Star Scream has an annoying voice! He is a bit too pussy for my liking, when instead he should be talking shit behind Megatron’s back as always.
  6. Megatron is rusty because of being underwater.
  7. The movie looks at more of a worldwide look rather than how the first one seemed to just show the States as being the entire world (just like how most movies do)
  8. The Decepticon remote control car is cute when he’s transformed as the car and driving around. Voice again, is just unbearable.
  9. President Obama is mentioned! Very cool how they did that.
  10. There is a joke about Swine flu in the movie – This is a great reference to current events. The audience laughed their butt off when this joke was pulled off. Good one!

To be honest I wish I could see a lot more from the cartoon. There were tons of elements in it that could have been chucked into a Transformers movie but they were overlooked. Dinobots? Galvatron (just because he’s cool)? Unicron (massive interplanetary¬†battles WITHOUT humans, just like the cartoon but build the plot on the idea that if the Autbots lose, Unicron eats Earth)? Finally, the introduction of Hot Rod and subsequently RODIMUS PRIME (totally do-able and they made people across the world cry with an animated movie, why not do it with all your fancy Hollywood script writing)!

Also, it would be nice to see more focus on the actual Transformers characters rather than just Bumblebee, (very slightly) Optimus Prime and Megatron? Also, do not base the entire fuckin’ movie on a character you made up (the Fallen) because this character has NOTHING to do with the Fallen from Transformers comics or animated series. Lastly, please put Prime’s face mask back on – Why wasn’t it on in that big forest scene? His face makes him look like ¬†a big robotic ape.


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